"Suit up soldier, We're going to Egypt!"
It's a picture etched in my mind;
God standing there, speaking to my heart and myself eagerly nodding.
I got here to Egypt and dove into things just as eagerly as when I left home,
Things worked, weeks flew by, but I grew tired.
Nothing had changed to my work load, and while yes, it is a challenging place to live sometimes, Egypt itself hadn't changed any since I'd been here.
I got frustrated, I got angry with myself.
I continued to trudge through, not knowing why this tiredness was happening or what had caused it.
I failed to fully recognize that when God sent me here, He didn't send me alone.
I began to grow tired because I was fighting through things under my own strength alone.
Looking back at the picture now, I hear the words, "WE'RE going in."
I hang my head in shame, stupidly I had jumped the gun.
I forgot one of the most important truths of my faith, God is always with me.
I broke ranks, and as soon as I did, I was surrounded, exposed and outnumbered.
Our God is a God that lets us learn our lessons,
He doesn't let us take on more then we can bear.
Our God is great.
Just when I felt helpless, I realized why.
With my mind focused on God's strengths and truths the fighting got easier.
Nothing compares to Gods strength, darkness cowers at His voice.
God has been fighting here much longer than I have,
He has been using others in more powerful ways then I could have imagined,
and that Truth is humbling.
God has lifted my up and set me on a rock now,
I'm spending time with Him and learning more about His character as I do so.
As I spend some time reflecting I go back again to the picture of God instructing me.
"Suit up soldier, We're going in!"
I was suited up, I was strong, but when I stumbled, I found the holes in my armor,
The things I thought were hidden became my weakest points.
With God at my side, I have started on re-crafting my armor.
As part of my internship here, it was required that each of us take "Cell Pastor Training."
A course which focus' on raising up cell group leaders for the purpose of leading new church cells.
An aspect of the church which works on the Upward, Inward, Outward and Forward life of the church body.
Through my time in the course and through this newly focused time with God,
He has made it blatantly clear to me that I need to start a young mens study group within the refugee schools here.
The weakness that have been exposed are those that every young man struggles with on some level and with the insight and training that God has been granted me through this experience.
In no way am I set apart for this task, in no way do I have all the answers, but I have some experiences, some mistakes others can learn from.
The goal will be to provide a group in which these young men will feel comfortable in talking about the challenges they are wrestling with and through God's word and body, find restoration and a battle plan against that.
This time I suit up in confidence, with careful consideration for my weak points and a knowledge that God is fighting with me.
Thank you to you Jehovah-Nissi, The banner I carry forward.
Thank you to you Jehovah Shammah, The Lion at my side.
Onwards and Forwards,
Grace, Peace and Blessings,